Let’s talk honestly¬†

Hi everyone, I hope you are all doing well, sorry I haven’t blogged in a few weeks but I’ve been having the worst 3 weeks I’ve had in ages. 

Sadly like all chronic conditions you have some of the worst up and downs imaginable, so the past three weeks for me has been a hospital visit multiple partial dislocations and a lot of pain…along with many codeine highs, many mental break downs and a self esteem level of about 1%.

I realise my last 2 blogs have been a bit depressing however I feel like it is my place to explain this side of these conditions as well, if I want to educate people about these invisible illnesses then you need to know the bad sides as well. 

I realise that I am lucky that I do still get to experience the up days as well as the bad, however I have always been the person that puts other people before myself and I am very stubborn, unwilling to accept that I do need help and I can’t do everything on my own like I should be able to at the age of 20. 

When you end up partially dislocating 4 different body parts a day and have chronic depression and anxiety it means you find it incredibly hard to get out of bed every day and also to keep up relationships with people. I will be forever great full for the people that have truly stuck by me during all of this, even if I do have to bail on plans because I need to sleep or because I physically cannot move. 

You really learn during all of this the people that genuinely care about you and the the people that are not bothered at all and will just as easily drop you as they picked you up to begin with. If I didn’t have Ross and my friends frankie, Matt and Leanne I wouldn’t be the person that I am today. 

I know I am stubborn and can be hard work (I feel this especially applies to Ross) as I do not want him to have to do anything for me or for him to worry about me but I really appreciate every little thing anyone does for me, even if it is just to ask me how I am from time to time. 

I am going to try my hardest to write a few blog post over the next week and have them scheduled so I that I won’t have to miss any due to being sick or just not having the energy. I would like to say thank you to everyone that continues to read these and to everyone that will understand where I am coming from. 

I am going to sign off now as I’ve taken my sleeping tablets and am half asleep…can I also just say I a, 150 views off of 1000 across all my posts, you guys are the best I love you all for the support and love this is getting!!!

Signing off, 

Scarlett x

Chronic Illness vs Hobbies 

Hi everyone, 
I hope you are all doing well. I also apologise that this one is up a little later than usual but I have spent the past few days recovering from concussion. 

I’m going to start off with some good news that I read this week, Fibromyalgia is now becoming a step closer to being seen as a long term disability…now to someone that does not have Fibromyalgia you would probably think why is ’tis a good thing? Well it means that people that have this are finally beating the doctors views that it is not that bad and that it is easy to live with. 

Anyway this weeks blog is going to be about how hobbies and work actually help me with all of this, I still work full time and am currently in a job that I love, I enjoy going to work everyday, this is so important because it means that I am able to put my medical problems to the back if mind and get on with a days work. If I were to sit at home everyday my depression and anxiety would have come on a lot quicker and would be a lot worse this would also be the case if I didn’t have Ross to look after me as well. 

I ave tried to make sure that I have kept on with my love of reading, from a young age me and my sister have always read books and I still see it as one of the most enjoyable things it do, you can lose yourself to your imagination and this means that I can put the pain to the back of my mind as much as possible. I currently have over 40 unread books sat on a shelf that I am slowly working my way through, I keep telling Ross that I won’t buy anymore books then gain new ones pretty much every month…

It is really important to try and keep in contact with your friends, and trust me being diagnosed with all of these medical problems really shows who your real friends are and who will just drop you because you can’t make plans or never feel up to going out. I am thankful that I do still have some of the most incredible people around me it makes dealing with all of this a whole lot easier…I feel so alone with all of this most of the time as there is not enough awareness out there not many people are willing to learn about it either so it can make you feel really alone. 

My favourite hobby of all however is sleeping…with chronic fatigue it is all about balance and pacing yourself, you need enough rest but also need to remain active, this is hard for a lot of people and these conditions will consume you if you do not have the willpower to fight against them. It is really hard to keep your willpower up I think I have a weekly breakdown where I just can’t face slapping a smile on and getting on with it.

That is my personal motto though….no matter how hard life hits you, slap a smile on and power through, it won’t always be this bad. 

I am going to sign off here, I’m off to see rob Beckett perform tonight and my fingers are hurting from all this time (the joys of being a spoonie) I’m gonna leave a picture of me below just so that you can Actually put a face to the writing!

Signing off for now
Scarlett x